Paper 3: Boyfriend

Part 1: Reading
You are about to read a short piece about a woman and her experiences with both a good boyfriend and a bad boyfriend.

The piece contains vocabulary which may be unfamiliar to you. Below are several matrices containing vocabulary which will be presented in the piece. The first matrix has been matched for you.

Good Boyfriend
saw often (several times a week)
emotionally engaged
comforting
available
collaborative
generous with gifts
enjoyed the same activities
cheerful
artistically active
sexually curious
faithful
honest and forthcoming
supportive
expressive (words, actions) of love
intrigued by our differences

Bad Boyfriend
stingy with gifts (she gave him more gifts than he gave her)
argumentative
impatient
unavailable (saw only twice a month)
constantly "too busy"
liar
secretive
lazy (never traveled to meet her)
embarrassed of her
emotionally cold
insistent on only doing his activities
intolerant and mocking of difference
controlling (insistent on forming her personality)
abusive (insulting language, raised voice)
mocking of dreams beyond the present reality
sexually insistent
demanding of being the centre of attention
cheating

Part 2: Speaking
After reading the piece, please speak for five minutes, and compare and contrast your own situation. Do you think your current boyfriend has more in common with the good boyfriend, or the bad boyfriend?

18th Century Pop

Stairway Unto He'en
Thank you, Sir, for what the urban Peasantry would call a SHOUT-OUT.
She Blind'd Me With Natural Philosophie
Porto-Wine Supernova
My milkcart brings all the rakes to the yard forthwith, and verily, it is better than thine!

Oh, if only it was me inventing this, but it's not, it's the Dictionarie of the Esteemed Master Dr. Samuel Johnson.

The Rawest Of Foods

I have eaten in raw food restaurants: I found the experience delicious, and also entirely satisfying of my hunger. But this venture does take some cojones.

Bad Faith

"It can't be done," you said. "It can never be achieved."
"I quit. It's impossible."
Lazy, laconic words and deeds
Insulting, you were.
Laughter at inventiveness, mocking of any dream.
Impatient at the last, you settled
for what was near, and styled it
re-shaped it, configured it, reformed it
as love.

Love is not the pickings
The renderings, leftovers
Call it rather, expediency
For souls of bad faith.

It is done.
I have kept all my promises.
the keys handed over
The work is finished
the move has been made
the new life, started over.

Didn't you make promises to yourself?
Didn't you have ambitions?
In the circle of our love, we made plans. Not for us, but for you.
Fear crept in.
Your first lie to me, was not your last.
You struggled against me
But the fight was with yourself.
Kicking, balking, you fled.
"I'll never be discovered," you thought, "if I hide amongst the donkeys"

And even at the last
as I pass the final marker
across the finish line
All I can feel for you, is sorry
for your cowardice.

Yoko Ono

"Art is a vibration that spreads its influence across the earth." - Yoko Ono

Gilberto Gil

"Caetano and I were on this same stage in 1969" he said, and the audience squealed in delight.
How many, I wondered, even born in that year?
A younger diaspora present, not political migrants perhaps but economic
He didn't speak for me although I listened
Migrants are migrants, after all.
Mixed race, is mixed race.

So sweetly serenaded, these last days
Saudade I can only guess at
Not for me and yet I begin to grasp
The nuance of a word
the feeling of departure
the nature of Tropicália

Bad Sex In Fiction Award

I'm sorry to say, that Nick Cave has been nominated.

The First Day

Oh Porto

"It's a city of broken dreams and shattered promises" Bogart might have said,
when putting Lauren Bacall on the train at São Bento.
The carriage door clicking with the rattle
that modern trains of plastic and steel never conjure
the steam just that bit more atmospheric
the rain puddling rather majestically
beneath the iron work roof.

Not Amalia Land but something a bit more hardworking
Torrada thown at you rather than placed
it would skid across the time-worn counter unless my hand had stopped it from its certain trajectory

I think those atmospheric boats below
are not pleasure craft
but might really be working.

On Beauty

"I have no sense of colour" you once said. "No sense of design."
You eye did not light up at the curve of expression, the hint of form.
Once we sat and read and like a child you yearned to hold the book,
your finger ached to touch the pictures.
You vibrated, and called it beauty.
You stood upon the very edge, but turned away and fled.
What was it in your nature, that had missed a soft brushstroke of tenderness
which would enable a tremble before beauty?
You ear was half open but you had cloth eyes
what had darkened them?
What caused you to lust for brutality
not Cubist but lumpen
a nature dumb to grace but open to force?

The body thrills when equal force is met
The personality wakened by the language of beauty.
A Michelangelo hand stretched impassioned,
Masculinity softened by artistry.
A knowing eye, an open heart, a lack of shame in softness
A restful calm, an unwritten song
of beauty.

There Will Be No

There will be no sushi
There will be no underage teenagers drinking cans of lager on the top deck of the bus
There will be no solicitors and builders huddled under awnings smoking fags and sloshing pints
There will be no escalators
There will be no "pound a bowl pound a bowl punnet strawbs" men shouting in front of the Tube station
There will be no overheated shops selling spiky, sexy half-boots and artfully slashed t-shirts
There will be no queues
not where I'm going

Not a Disney sanitation
Not Morrissey in a 20 year old copy of the hated NME
Gritty, awful, horrible London
Breathing, lovely London
As you were.

Embarrassing Insecurity

Oh dear.
It's like watching a public cum shot.
Even whores have more discretion.

The Choice

Once, this would have been the happiest choice of my life. Now, it is one of the weirdest.

Life sometimes throws strange decisions your way. And you have to be strong enough to seize them, without having the ability to divine the future.

Sometimes there is no time to think. You simply just have to do, and trust yourself to fate.

Miranda

... and for that matter, David Mitchell.

Jay-Z on Later With Jools Holland

Jools Holland: "... and later, Jay-Z will be sitting down with me at the piano and we'll do a little bit of boogie woogie."
Jay-Z: "Whuh nigga?"

Going Shopping

Chelsea transfer ban is suspended.

[shop bell rings as Abramovich enters]

Shop owner: How can I help you sir?
Abramovich: Hello, I'd like a dozen players please. I'd like two Javier Saviola's, two Oscar Cardozo's... hmm, how much is that Cesc Fabregas?
Shop owner: Several million, sir.
Abramovich: (digs around for loose change), here you go, a bit steep but I've got this in my pocket anyway. Erm, go ahead and make up the rest with AC Milan first squad, and we'll call that a dozen.
Shop owner: Paper or plastic, sir?
Abramovich: Neither, I've got my own private plane just outside.

1001 Uses For A Stick

"It's one of the most popular children's TV programmes in history, but it's no longer on most British screens. So why did we fall out of love with Sesame Street?"

From: BBC

There are some classic Sesame Street moments, my favourite including Stevie Wonder. But I love this Robin Williams clip as well: trust the kid inside Mr. Williams to come up with this many uses for a stick.

Some Football Chants I Just Made Up

"You're a stupid bitch and you know you are"

"you put your left foot in
left foot out
in out, in out you shake it all about
you drop your knickers and fuck any dick that'll take you
thats what its all about"

"When the cum hits you eye like a big pizza pie
That's a whore, aye?
When your boy seems to shine 'cos he's plied you with wine
That's a whore, aye!
Bells will ring ting-a-ling-a-ling, ting-a-ling-a-ling
And you'll sing "Vita bella"
Hearts will play tippy-tippy-tay, tippy-tippy-tay
For your moronic bi fella"

"I'll get the money, I'll see you get the money
With your tight trousers on the floor, the boys were waitin' at the door
You know that ain't shit, you used to get lots of dick with your greased lightnin'

Genesis According To Crumb

... here.

Bonfire Night

"What they [Guy Fawlkes and the co-conspirators] conspired, was no less than an ethnic cleansing of London."

Did you think that Guy Fawkes was a hero of the anti-establishment? Well, I have some news for you: you are ignorant.

According to A History of Scotland, the Gunpowder Plot was brought about directly by unhappiness with James VI Stuart of Scotland and I of England, and their preference for the Scottish nobles at court in London. The conspiracy was not against power or even Catholics specifically, but to ethnically cleanse London of Scots.

Indendiary? You could say so, yes. It's an interesting and rather surprising historical take, but the common saying is that "history is (re)written by the victors."

I don't mind that Bonfire Night has stepped away from the original commemoration. Like Halloween, this is no bad thing. If you ask me, I rather like sweets and the smell of smoke.

Feeling Grumpy Is Good For You

In a bad mood? Don't worry - according to research, it's good for you.

An Australian psychology expert who has been studying emotions has found being grumpy makes us think more clearly.

In contrast to those annoying happy types, miserable people are better at decision-making and less gullible, his experiments showed.

The rest of this piece is similarly brilliant, read it here.

Official research from the University of Woolloomooloo.

Take Care Of Yourself

'I received the email telling me it was over while walking around Berlin a few years ago,' says Sophie Calle of the unceremonious break-up that became the centre of her expansive investigation into post-relationship deception and anxiety. She sent the message to friends and then to other women in as many different professions as she could, including a forensic psychologist, a crossword puzzler, a school teacher, as well as a sharpshooter, a dancer and even a cartoonist (not to mention pals like Laura Anderson, Carla Bruni and Miranda Richardson)."

What was the reaction from the subject? Did he see it as revenge?
'I had to be clear about that with myself, that it was a work of art, not of revenge. At the beginning he said that he didn't like being the victim of the idea but that he respected it, which I thought was very generous. The project became better than my life with him, so once I saw the possibilities of the work I began to pray that he wouldn't come back, even though I was still very much in love. Actually we became very friendly because of it all.'

Read the full article here.

Manga Chaos In London

... but one of the most hellish crossings in London has suddenly become a lot more fun. :)

Presets

This Boy's In Love

Our Secret

You and I have a secret
A truth never told
but if it were to unfold
a pressure, to reveal,
be assured I would never do anything so untoward
as actually steal your happiness.
Your house of lies remains standing.
This story is interred
as our memory.
Bless your lucky stars
That I am merciful
where you are not.

Tusk

Creativity

Good Friday?

Yeah! Usual string of funny emails to respond to, just happy that the weekend is coming soon and it looks like a good one. I'm also laughing, because a friend sent me the music video he's been working on for several months.

His own music?

Oh no! Although he is a musician. He's been editing together a video for some friends, they shot it with no budget at all, no actors, no sets...

How is it?

It's actually really good. They did well, even with limited resources. In fact, they scened it in just a way that it looks intentionally low-fi. It's cleverly done. It feels really good, to be friends with people who are actively being creative, and actually getting their things done and released. It makes me feel motivated, and encouraged.